birthday blues

its official

i am off the calendar.

am slightly depressed

on being alone

It's a day before I finally drop out of the calendar, so to speak.

and I'm desperately single.
so much.

We usually equate happiness to include having someone with us. I don't think I'm that happy but I'm satisfied. Somehow living a fairly simple life: (yes guys, I'm actually boring), without a television set or even a radio, and for about 11 months now, without a landline (and internet on demand)-- I've to go to the office or an internet cafe or even the gym just to blog, made it easier.

Somehow, I know I'm slightly intimidating (slight daw o?), am very witty (trans: one-liner bitch), and seemingly without regard to other peoples' feelings (trans: insercure one-liner bitch) so there is about no chance in the world that there is a person with enough confidence to actually ask me out, or befriend me.

Maybe being a Scorpio, I have an idea on how to hurt most people.

Even myself.

I let go of the possibility of love a few years ago, and its only now that I've accepted the fact that I might live the rest of my life alone. *sigh*

And one more thing about me, I nest. Especially when I don't feel comfortable. You should see the floor of my room now. If you can see it actually.

To all my princes charming (or otherwise) who got lost in the enchanted forest to save a non-damsel in slight distress:

Just listen to my song and close your eyes.

Don't be fooled by the smoke, and green scales.

Am actually a princess deep down, really.

Just get over my dragon exterior.

Happy birthday to me.

two weeks later

and even though i havent been writing means i dont have thoughts of writing.

i havent been writing.

ive been going to the gym.

im looking for an apartment.

and it seems that lately, ive been attracting maniacs.

a few nights ago, after going to the gym, i walked all the way to there the buses stop after using the fly over. There was an oldish man, about 40ish, well he looked fortyish, who kept massaging the khaki clad crotch while looking at me and making slurpy noises. *shivers*

when he saw that i wouldnt budge, he boarded a bus going to baclaran. i on the other hand, had no hopes of getting an ayala bus, so i got a cab.

i wanted to see if he had the guts to uncover himself along edsa. not really the size or shape of his member, but having the guts to do it along manila's major thoroughfare.

no guts.


-not another scorpio